Earlier this week, my amazing friend Jimmy (@ThisIsGrief) and I (nervously) launched our monthly podcast series called Healing Hour! Our intention for this podcast series is to show up just as we are and discuss the things that we are going through or things that we have been through. The hard stuff. We both believe that difficult conversations about mental health, grief, trauma, stress, relationships and other complex issues need to be talked about more. We want to normalize these conversations because as humans, we ALL go through them. So, why are they still so taboo? We all need that safe space to be vulnerable with what it is that we REALLY think and feel. Instead of automatically responding with "I'm good" or "I'm fine" when someone asks how you're doing, start getting honest.
We hope that hearing us share our experiences inspires you in some positive way!
Just like many of you, I spent way too long hiding my shadow behind a mask. I'd show authentic parts of myself, but I'd hide the other parts of me. I'd show just enough to look vulnerable or brave...and that was it. The rest kept getting pushed to the back of the line. The shame. The guilt. The lack of self-worth. I thought I needed all these parts of me to be gone or healed entirely before I was ALLOWED to talk about these things. I kept asking myself " who the heck am I to talk about these topics? I don't have all the answers because if I did, I'd be healed. I'd be NORMAL. How can I help anyone if I can't fix it entirely?" Once I realized that I'm already exactly who I need to be to make an impact, I started pushing through all those self-limiting beliefs that were holding me back. No one has all the answers, which is a good thing because I probably couldn't afford to pay for their guidance anyways. What I need- what we ALL need, is authenticity. We all need vulnerability and the willingness to be uncomfortable so that we can grow. I had an insane insight a few months ago when I was talking about the role that journaling has played in my life, especially in recovery. AND THEN I REALIZED THAT I HAVE FILTERED MYSELF IN MY JOURNALS FOR AS LONG AS I CAN REMEMBER. Like, I always had this fear that someone would read it and that it would change the way they viewed me as a person....so I fucking filtered myself. In every journal I've ever had. Mind you, I've literally kept a journal since I was in elementary school. DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY JOURNALS ARE SITTING AT SOME LANDFILL SOMEWHERE WITH PAGES FILLED WITH BULLSHIT? Do you even know how mind-blowingly scary that is to me? Especially being the person I am today. Fear and fear of judgment specifically is so real and it keeps SO many of us trapped. Good news, it's something we can overcome. It does take courage to speak your truth, but courage is like a muscle. The more you use it, the easier it becomes. Sharing with intention is key. You want to figure out WHY you're sharing. Is it to seek reasurrance or validation? That may not go over so well. If you're sharing because you want to create some kind of impact or you want people to relate to what you say, that's important. I recently learned from one of my mentors named Ruby Fremon that when you share what you ACTUALLY feel and it comes from that deep-rooted authentic place, it's easier to feel confident in yourself and in your voice. There will always be people who agree and people wh don't agree- we can't always be liked by everyone. Think of EVERY big thinker, impact maker, celebrity, politician you can...and now think of how many different opinions you've heard or read about them. People are entitled to their perspectives, but it doesn't invalidate yours. Some of you may read this and resonate, where as others read it and think "what the F is the talking about?" Both are okay. That doesn't take anything away from my message.
All I can say is that I am SO incredibly grateful for the tribe I have of friends, mentors, coaches, teachers, family and chosen family that keep PUSHING me so damn hard to become who I am today. The keep evolving into the best version of myself I can be. Jimmy and I would absolutely LOVE to hear your feedback on Healing Hour! If you haven't already, you can go listen here.